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How often does feeling guilty stop you from being happy? If you’re like me, there are some skeletons in my closet that I wish I could forget. Sadly, it doesn’t work like that. Just turning and hiding from them doesn’t make them go away. But the good news is we can overcome them so they don’t slow us down. In this episode I share how you can overcome guilt and forgive yourself.
In December of 2020 I began doing live meditations on a website and app called Insight Timer. That app is my favorite and is what I used when first started and continue to use it regularly. While talking to the folks who attend my live sessions, many of them said that they could use more help with forgiveness and dealing with guilt. So that’s why I created this episode. To help you deal with guilt and forgive yourself.
We are our own worst critic, when really, we need to be our biggest supporter. To get there, you need to learn how to forgive yourself. Everybody will have great days, and there will be some bad days too, but you need to learn how to swing back from the bad ones and forgive yourself.
Quick definition, what is guilt? Guilt is when you feel bad about something, whether it was something you did or didn’t do, or something you said or didn’t say. However, whatever it is that you feel bad about, you can’t change it, it’s in the past. There are many things in my life that I wish I could change, but I need to accept the fact that I can’t. Instead of feeling guilty about what happened you need to learn and grow from it, and then move on. Then there are times when other people can accuse you of things and make you feel guilty. If you recognize that’s what they’re doing then you can think about what you might have done wrong, think of what you can do to fix it in the future, and then put it behind you.
Then work to forgive yourself for whatever may have happened and move forward. The first thing that really helped me in this process is to remind myself that I’m human. Part of being human is making mistakes, you can never do everything right all the time. Because we are human, we can learn and grow from our mistakes.
Another way to help overcome guilt is to name your guilt. Oftentimes we build up our guilt until it’s overwhelming. What is it specifically that you feel guilty about? Most of the time what we feel guilty about is something small, but we build it up into this huge thing. Naming what you’re guilty about will help bring it back down to size, and help you realize that it isn’t some huge horrific thing. Once you realize that it’s small, it’s easier to let go of it and forgive yourself for it.
Give yourself grace, life happens, you’re going to make mistakes! When you realize you made a mistake, admit it to yourself, but don’t beat yourself up for it. If it happened to someone else, you would probably give them a second chance, give yourself a second chance too. It is easier said than done, but it is doable. Release whatever guilt you feel and forgive yourself for what was done, because you can’t change it. Learn and grow from what happened, you can be stronger from that experience.
One final tip is to celebrate your wins and the successes you have! If you get through a day without feeling guilty for whatever was done, celebrate that! If you got something important done at work, celebrate that! If you ate a healthy meal for dinner, celebrate that! Celebrate the good times in your life! We all carry guilt in our life and wish we could take things back, and we need to forgive ourselves for those things. You don’t need to let those things slow you down and stop you from living your life to the max. Let go of them and grow from them. You deserve to be living your best life and not letting mistakes hold you back anymore. It all starts with you forgiving yourself and making yourself stronger because of them. It might take time, but it will happen, and it is worth it.
I would love to hear what you think about Guilt and Forgiveness! Please send me a message on social media @Jonesinfor or email me at [email protected]