Self-Hate, the other side of the coin from Self-Love

Self-Hate - Episode 91

We generally hear and talk about Self-Love, which is important but we are missing a big part of the conversation. We need to address the opposite side of the coin. It’s time we talk about Self-Hate. Not self-love, not self-respect, but self-hate. How many times have you beat yourself up mentally or physically? How many times have you looked in the mirror and did not like the reflection looking back at you? Your inner bully telling you you’re not enough, you’re not worthy, you’ll never get there, you don’t deserve it, and all the self-hate. Hate is toxic and is spreading, not just with others but within ourselves. But it doesn’t have too. We can stop it. We can change it! Many times we are beating ourselves up. We dislike who we are and can’t seem to find a good thing about our life. Well in this episode of the Jonesin’ for Show, I’ll share 3 strategies to help you stop the self-hate and resolve it!

This is not an easy subject by any means but it is something that many struggle with. I struggled with it not too long ago and let me tell you it SUCKS! So let’s not wait and dive into these three strategies to help you resolve that self-hate.

First, you need be aware. Awareness is the key to everything. Be aware of your thoughts and your feelings/emotions. Also, be aware of the stories you’re telling yourself and telling others? You will notice that you probably tell and have some negative stories, feelings, and thoughts. Don’t beat yourself up about them. Forgive yourself. Offer yourself some grace, love, and compassion. And the one forward. You can ask yourself if those stories, thoughts, and feelings are true. Are they real? Because many times, they are not. You are worthy and you are enough, always. We are all humans and humans make mistakes. Remember to offer yourself grace, love, and compassion. Don’t stay in that low. Learn and grow from it so you can move forward.

Second, pull those weeds from your backyard. Many times we feel that we have this dark spot in our lives. We have guilt and shame, we are frustrated and angry. We have those negative habits that pull that dark veil around us. We all have them, it’s part of being human and growing up. But the good news is that they don’t need to stay. We can get rid of them. It’s time to ditch the veil and see the light. All of those negatives stem from something. Each of the negatives is a weed you have in your own mental backyard. You don’t need them. It’s time to pull them. Get rid of the weeds and ditch the negativity. After you pull the weeds, then throw them out and plant seeds of beautiful flowers. Turn the negative into positive. Those positives could be affirmations, mission statements, thoughts and feelings of love and compassion. Take those and help them grow. Grow that positive.

The third strategy is to know you are worth of and start to offer yourself something that many do talk about, self-love. At the beginning of these notes I mentioned that we don’t talk about the other side, the Self-Hate, and that is true. But one way to help get over the Self-Hate is know you are worthy to receive self-love. And then start practicing it. I will say that doing the first two strategies are HUGE and help clear the negativity. Then you can fill the void that left with self-love practices. You can do everything from meditating to chasing your passions or enjoying a cup of coffee to watching a movie you love. Whatever you do, make sure it fills your cup, you enjoy it, and/or it spreads positivity to others while not draining you. Remember it’s not an overnight process, it takes time. Start practicing self-love then you can start building up and do other things and recharge your battery. Pull those weeds, plant the beauty.

Many times we hear and talk about Self-Love without addressing the other side of the coin, Self-Hate. We need to recognize that it is there and many people struggle with it. Work on resolving it and letting it go. Then fill the void with Self-Love. If you’re struggling right now, do the work and also seek people to help you. Find people that will help you.

I would love to hear your thoughts about this Self-Hate Episode of the Jonesin’ for Show. Send me a message on Facebook or Instagram. You can find me at @Jonesinfor or send me an email at Spencer@spencermjones.com